I think a lot about beauty… I talk about beauty, I listen to friends talk about beauty, I read about beauty, and I write about beauty. But, mostly I think about beauty. I think about whether or not it is relevant, about whether or not it really matters, whether or not it’s a good use of my time, and pretty much any other type of over analyzing you could imagine.

Then, I remembered a story. My freshman year of college this girl and I had a crush on the same boy. She was for all intents and purposes “homely.” She had long (very long) dark hair that looked as if it had most likely never been cut and definitely never been dyed. She wore glasses that made her look like she was 12 years old rather than the close to 19 she actually was. She was shy, timid, and scared of everything. (Needless to say… not a lot of competition. I got the boy.)

I say all this to paint a picture because the thing is… this girl was gorgeous! Seriously. And, the thing about her that bothered me most wasn’t the fact that she could have made head turns if she wanted to, but the fact that she had no self confidence at all. It drove me crazy.

Eventually, we had more than one late night talk as girls often did in the dorms that year of college. At some point, I offered to do a make-over. She told me that while a lot of the time she felt invisible, she wouldn’t know what to do with the attention if she got it.

That is the thing about making heads turn, it takes practice and it’s uncomfortable. But, it does provide some of us with some confidence. Everyone has times when they want to be invisible and everyone has times when they want to turn heads, even if it’s just one head on the other side of a dinner date. I think the delicate balance of these two things can help boost self confidence. In order to be a well rounded person you don’t want to hover in one or the other too long. You can’t be too attention grabby or you could end up exhausting yourself from the act. And, you can’t be too invisible for too long because sometimes it feels good to give a fuck.

In the end, I’ve decided beauty can be an aid to boost self confidence. Ultimately, beauty always comes from within, as mentioned at the end of each post. So, I am curious with what you guys think. Is beauty relevant? Does it matter?

Mostly, I think people should do whatever they want and whatever makes their day in and day out great. Sometimes, that might be a foot cream that keeps the calluses away.


***beauty always comes from within, photo by Amiram Assouline, xoxo behind the mirror***

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