Secrets, Secrets are No Fun

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Everyone has secrets. For real. Everyone. And while secrets, secrets are no fun, secrets secrets hurt someone is pretty much bull shit at this point in adulthood, some secrets keep us going… and yes, some are bad. I have this theory that I don’t really tell people, as I am afraid the moment I say it out loud it will be revealed as completely ridicules and I will no longer be able to live by this theory. The premise goes like this, every day without notice I should be able to jump into a bikini and take a swim. You know, like a free spirit… like you’re in a car with a friend driving somewhere and say, “hey that lake looks nice, let’s jump in, I have my bikini in my bag,” like someone who just lives that sort of anything could happen at a moments notice life. 

Let’s be clear. I don’t live this type of life. For starters, I live in the northeast of the united states and currently it is sub-forty degrees outside, which makes the possibility of me jumping like a free spirit into a pool of water right around zero. Not to mention, as much as I fight it, routine is up there on the list of things that happen in my life right now… work, home, friends. work, home, friends. work, home, friends.

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But psyche aside, I really do this for a different reason. And what is so funny is I say it to myself almost every day and it actually motivates me to do things like shave my legs. Seriously. Sometimes when I am really tired and I don’t want to take morning grooming to that level of feeling comfortable in front of others, I actually say to myself, “What if I need to get into a bikini today?” And that idiotic thought motivates me to do a number of things…

– Keep up with waxes in the winter months.

Which is really just smart planning… I mean you go all winter without a wax and then drop in before memorial day weekend and trust me you will regret it… but it is a pain in the ass (pun intended). There’s making the appointment,  going to the spa, and blah blah… However, tell yourself you might end up in a bikini today and you find the motivation. The sheer thought of getting into a bathing suit without a proper wax is so horrifying that I keep the appointment. Every time. Not the $125.00 cancellation fee. No, that wouldn’t do it. Just the bikini thought.

– Lingerie…

Because obviously when I change into this bathing suit for this random dip in arctic temperatures someone else will be there and inevitably will see my undergarments.  Always cute, almost always lace, and pretty matchy matchy… no white cotton panties over here, because I need to be ready to take the plunge. Honestly, it makes no sense but these are the motivational thoughts that keep me going…

– Shaving my legs.

That is just a given at this point in the fake world I am currently living.

– I do draw the line at waterproof mascara.

I do actualize this concept enough to not wear waterproof mascara everyday. Mainly because I don’t like it and can’t ever get it off… and also mainly because I don’t wear mascara everyday and therefore it isn’t really an issue.

I do draw the line at waterproof mascara. I do actualize this concept enough to not wear waterproof mascara everyday. Mainly because I don't like it and can't ever get it off... and also mainly because I don't wear mascara everyday and therefore it isn't really an issue. woman with cucumber on eyes, woman with red lips, woman with two buns, topknots

After speaking with a friend over the weekend about strange thoughts we tell ourselves for whatever reason, it seemed like a fun thing to share. But now I am so curious, what are your strange, motivating thoughts or secrets that help you keep up with all the things that we as women need to keep up with?

***beauty always comes from within, photos from here and there, XOXO behind the mirror***
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